What makes love go and how to bring it back?

It is not an exaggeration to say that love is something everyone is after. From the day we are born, we crave it as the primary source of happiness and contentment. This deep intimate connection with another person unlocks some sort of an extra dimension within us. We suddenly and naturally become a better version of ourselves without making any effort for it. The world becomes beautiful, the problems seem insignificant, understanding comes easily. This is what they call a stage of euphoria which is beautiful, powerful and… does not last forever.

It is thought that the initial stage of romantic relationship is when you have a strong positive bias towards the partner and you fail to see them as they are. Gradually, as the fog of illusion fades away, the reality kicks in and magic disappears. Ever since then begins a never-ending struggle to bring the magic back. This is how we learn that lasting love is an everyday effort. But what kind of effort should it be?

What is the right effort?

The very natural and most correct answer would be to make an effort to nourish the source of love. Having this right intention in mind, we yet tend to confuse the source. Since love is something we experience as a result of interaction with another person, we tend to externalize it and identify the source with the person. This is how we believe the key to love is outside: to become more accommodating, more understanding, more giving and forgiving. While all this will certainly improve any relationship, however it will not guarantee love as a result of it. Why?

Why love is so elusive at times?

A way to resolve this contradiction is to take the source of love from hands of another person and place it inside ourselves. In that case, the quality of love becomes nothing else than an indicator of our self-development and a navigator on the path of evolution. We tend to reach out to people who help us evolve and activate our good qualities. Yet, to make this inner transformation last is ultimately our job. It is just like with meditation or yoga practice: when you start practicing for the first time you will feel the boost of energy and peace you were not able to access before, but if you do not maintain this fire within you with daily practice, it will disappear.

Love is a guiding star

This is how you let your love become a guiding star on the path of your self-development. When the star is no longer shining for you, it is about the time to re-connect with your true self and listen carefully what your inner voice has to say. You re-connect with yourself when you start doing what you love, spend time in the nature, meditate. Meditation has a power to bring us back to the source of tranquillity and peace and also illuminate the path of unconditional love and compassion. Love that is ready to give from the space of abundance, and love that never fades.

Love is a generous and strict teacher that makes us learn how to connect with our authenticity and true purpose because only then we can find a never-ending source of it within.

If you would like to start or deepen your meditation practice, try our free self-development program here!

Photo credits: Michael Fenton, unsplash

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