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Know Your Core Values To Change Your Actions

It’s not hard to make decisions when you know what your core values are.” Roy Disney

The content of our mind is shaped by our values, and all actions are a reflection of how we perceive our world. Priorities and reactions in life are determined by what we value.

Regardless of whether we acknowledge our values or not, they are there, and they do influence every decision and action that we take in life.

One of the clearest and easier-to-relate-to value system that I encountered and that continues inspiring me is The Four Agreements of Don Miguel Ruiz.

  1. Be Impeccable with your Word

    Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the Word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your Word in the direction of truth and love.

  2. Don’t Take Anything Personally

    Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.   

  3. Don’t Make Assumptions

    Find the courage to ask questions and express what you really want. Communicate with others as clearly as you can to avoid misunderstandings, sadness and drama. With just this one agreement, you can completely transform your life.   

  4. Always Do Your Best

    Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to feeling sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgement, self-abuse, and regret.

We feel content and happy when our actions are aligned with our core values, we experience a life that is good.

Continue your deeper search for meaning here.

Photo credits: Clark Tibbs @unsplash.com

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The Gift of Breathing In and Out

Imagine your nose is blocked, and you can only breathe with your mouth! Something so unnatural, like walking on your hands! Due to the nose septoplasty surgery (where a doctor corrects deviated septum by straightening it and re-positioning it in the middle),  I spent 2 weeks breathing with my mouth only which made me realize how nothing in this world matters more than our breath.

No pain, no gain or the moment of sweet naivety fading away

When the day of a surgery came, I was calm, not thinking of what it could be like. I was actually even looking forward to the general anaesthesia as I had experienced it once and remembered it being fun. Losing conscious totally, feeling a bit drowsy afterwards? Will be cool! I was encouraging myself. Obviously my mind removed all the bad memories of that day as it was several years ago. Anyways, there was no stepping back when lying down on the table, breathing in through my nose for the last time – so, the least I could do was looking at it from a positive perspective, right?

And then the reality hit me. Pain! Welcome! You wanted fun? Here it is! Angry voice (or is it actually that wise voice I was ignoring until now?) appeared in my head. Thankfully, there are pain killers. I was actually pretty glad for all those legal drugs they stuffed me with to make this suffering a bit more bearable. When you are overwhelmed with pain, so severe that there is barely something else you can focus on, you are glad for whatever brings you a slight relief. In that moment, I felt empathy and understanding for all the drug addicts. Yet, at the end, as even the effect of a painkiller faded away, I had to decide to accept the pain counting on its impermanence.

Then, as my nose was swollen, ears, upper lip, teeth and throat hurting, I realized how much everything is connected in our body. Isn’t it like that in our life too? You mess up one part and another one gets affected? Pure domino effect! Yet, what bothered me the most was the inability to breathe through my nose as it was blocked completely. I could breathe only with my mouth which is primarily not meant to do that! You know the feeling when you are forced to do something you don’t really want to but there is no other option? A rebel within me was totally furious but I just had to shut that part of myself down and keep following the instructions with trust and patience. Yes, another nice metaphor for life, what an irony! I thought.

What if this is the last day of my life?

Being frustrated and in pain, it was funny to observe my mind travelling to the moments in my life when I had felt similar but thought I had already forgotten about them. Thanks to this post-surgery time, I recalled a bike trip up north in Ladakh, India remembering myself and my friend reaching Pangong Tso Lake, 4250 metres above the sea level.

It was a cold November day (never go to Ladakh in November, bad idea!), and we felt pretty exhausted after a long ride, yet happy to find the only open guest house where we could get something to eat and warm up our limbs a bit. I had pictured that moment of lying down on a bed and taking a rest numerous times during that day. What I surely had not pictured was catching a high altitude disease that night: remembering myself not being able to catch a breath, breathing through my mouth only, trying to desperately collect some oxygen to survive, even thinking this could possibly be the last day of my life. Luckily, none of that happened, and I started to get better when descending down.

Why would my mind bring me this memory again? I wondered with my mouth open, inhaling and exhaling while lying down on a hospital bed. And then I got it. Total Hallelujah realization! This all happened to remind me of the importance of my own breath! Something I take for granted and don’t even think of so many times during the day, something I am not always aware of. But it is the breath which keeps me alive. It is the breath which calms me down when I feel under a pressure. It is a deep breath in and out bringing freedom to my soul, helping me to feel less stuck. This simple, yet extremely precious gift! How could I forget about it?

We breathe, so we are!

Now, as I could not take a refreshing breath through my nose, I felt jealous of everyone who could. Hey, people! Wake up! I wanted to tell them. You can breathe, can you hear me?! No matter what worries you carry, no matter what duties are waiting for you. None of that matters as much! Because you can breathe! And that is the most precious gift of all.

Breathing, the most miraculous part of being alive, does not only bring oxygen to our body so it can function properly; it has a positive effect on our mental health too when used in a right way. Breathing technique can relax our mind and body, it can release the tension and anxiety. When practising for some time, one can experience bliss, a meditation-like state which is a real journey within. Inhaling new positive energy and letting go of all that does not serve  anymore – exhale by exhale.

My post-surgery time was over, and I could breathe again! With such gratitude and joy like never before! We should indeed appreciate that we can take a deep breath in to refresh ourselves, and appreciate that we can breathe out to make us feel lighter. This only matters. Everything else is just an addition to that. We breathe, so we are. And breathing with a full awareness, using it as a relaxation technique can take us to another level. Just try it yourself, you may actually discover the whole new world. Ready?

Photo credit: Martina Trginová

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How to practice meditation?

The more we meditate, the more we notice the subtle details behind our meditation practice. The way we set our body and prepare our mind; these little things become important to ensure both relaxation and concentration in our practice. Here are some basics that are good to remember for keeping up with your meditation routine.

1) Make time to start a day with meditation! I set time aside in the mornings as after I get into the schedule of the day, the mind will be less obedient and more tempted to follow different thoughts. It helps me avoid getting “rushed” into meditation and then rushing through breath, relaxation, pushing things and other counter productive tendencies in the mind.

2) Give importance to preparation! It starts with simple aspects such as choosing the place to sit. Warmth, light, comfort, space – the less crowded with stuff it is, the better. I sit with legs crossed on the floor and prefer to have  enough room around me to stretch the legs.

3) Meditation starts in the body! It has become and remains the foundation of my practice. In the past, I used to overlook the body, minimise its importance, even neglect sensations, such as hunger, thirst, pain, – wanting to focus only on the mind, which I believed to be deserving different levels of attention.

The body is always reminding me: you are both body and awareness. Concentrating 100% inside and neglecting what is material is often leaving me with the impression of skimming the surface, as I am not relaxed enough. The body and the breath are my anchors to get into a meditative state of mind and have a good and relaxing meditation experience.

4) Let go of expectations! There is sometimes this need, even urge to have a different experience, to have the extraordinary experience. For me, keeping things simple is essential. So, when I sometimes get tempted by the wanting mind, it is a reminder to practice a humble attitude, to let go of the wanting, look with courage and honesty at myself. It is also about the practice of catching such attitudes and the expecting, wanting behaviours.

5) Make it simple! I strongly believe that the best meditations are those of simplicity. It gives me a sense of comfort in the body, a mental clarity that makes inner joy rise softly. If distractions and events that bother me are there, I learn to make a soft mental note of it. In the beginning, I can sometimes have a strong reaction, even anger towards myself or others. I work on accepting what is there, moment by moment. When I do the opposite and deny the feeling, or try to force it to go away, I am lost in a spiral of agitation. Softness and acceptance are the key to moving into neutrality. Because the only moment I feel quietness and comfort in the mind is when neutrality is there, stronger than anything else.

Give it a try, start today.

 

 

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عيش معانا التجربة

قبيل شهر، كنت من المشاركين في تدريب لإعداد مدربي التأمل واليقظه الذهنيه في مملكة تايلاند، وقد كان تدريبًا مختلفًا عن أي تدريب شاركت به في حياتي. ولهذا  قررت أن اكتب سلسة من المذكرات عن تلك الرحله لتعيشوا معي لحظات من أهم الدروس الحياتيه والمبادئ التي استفدت منها هناك وغيرت من حياتي الكثير

أول مذكراتي ستكون عن هذه البطاقات المنشورة أدناه؛

awesome card

can do better card

تدريبنا كان قائمًا بشكل أساسي علي تعزيز السلام الداخلي عند المتدربين بطرق مختلفة وأول شيء سأقوم بالكلام عنه هنا هو نظافة المكان الذي كنا نعيش فيه، وعن ترتيبه وتنظيمه لأنه يعكس بشكل كبير على نفسياتنا

 و كنوع من التشجيع على هذا الموضوع، فقد كانت الإدارة تقوم بفحص الغرف التي كنا نسكنها طوال تلك المدة، ووضع بطاقة من اثنتين للتقييم على النحو التالي

1.

Awesome Card

إذا كانت الغرفة نظيفة ومنظمة حسب المعايير المطلوبة

2.

You Can Do Better Card

وهذا إن كانت الغرفة غير مرتبة ونظيفة تبعًا للمعايير

 

لقد كان تأثرنا جميعًا بهذه البطاقات واضحًا ، ومما لفت نظري أنا شخصيًا هو بطاقة

You Can Do Better Card

والتي تعني أنه من الممكن أن تقوم بشيء أفضل من الذي قمت به ، فلم يقوموا باستخدام كلمات مثل 
Bad أو Not Good
فبرأيي المتواضع أنه وعند استخدام هذا النوع من كلمات التحفيز اللطيف، ومن دون إرسال رسائل سلبية تؤثّر على نفسية الشخص  الذي سيرى الكلمات أمامه سيترك للشخص دافعًا للقيام بأعمال أفضل. ففي الحقيقة وبرغم أننا أصبحنا كبارًا وبرغم زعمنا بعدم اكتراثنا للأساليب، إلا وأن هذا النوع من النصيحة يؤثر باللاوعي كما وسيؤثر بالعقل الباطن مما سيدفع الشخص لا شعوريًا بتطوير نفسه

 

الشيء الآخر الذي لفت انتباهي هو الإختلاف الذي حصل معي خلال الثلاث سنوات الماضية

 

ففي أول تدريب حضرته حصدت بطاقة واحدة “رائعة” وخمسة بطاقات من المكتوب عليهم “تستطيعين القيام بأفضل من هذا”. أما هذه السنة وبعد مرورهذا الوقت، استطعت تحصيل ستة بطاقات “رائعة”. ومن هنا أستطيع أن أخبركم بأن الدرس الذي تعلمته من هذه اللعبة هو

 

التغيير الكبير في شخصياتنا يبدأ بتغييرات بسيطة في نظام يومنا –
أسلوب التحفيز أفضل من أسلوب الذم ويقوم  بإرسال رسائل إيجابيه اكثر وذات مفعول أحسن –

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Harvard scholars inquire how to apply mindfulness in education curriculum

On 19th of March, nine visitors from Harvard Graduate School Of Education and Harvard Kennedy School visited World Peace Initiative Foundation (WPI) headquarters in Thailand to learn more about Thai education system, global education trends and policy recommendations.

The group from Harvard were interested in how we apply mindfulness and soft skills to education curriculum. So, during the visit WPI team presented the Peace Revolution project explaining about the PIPO (peace in, peace out) concept, how the project started, how it grows and the online platform that it offers along with a community that shares the interest in self-development through mindfulness and meditation.

The guests also had an opportunity to try a short meditation led by the CEO and co-founder of WPI, Ping Ping Worakate. Moreover, they showed a positive interest in WPI meditation retreats and the self-development program.

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How to develop new skills through meditation?

Meditation is still a taboo in some cultures of the world. Even in the circle of people who meditate today, many do not yet know how meditation can actually help them. In this article, I share some of my experiences after 5 years of meditation practice while explaining how to develop new skills through meditation.

I was a very nervous person

It was in 2015 when I longed to succeed without knowing how. At the time, a friend spoke to me about meditation as a tool for relaxation, self-control and self-confidence. The second argument convinced me because I was a very nervous person who did not know how to control his anger. Although I was often right, my anger played a lot against me in many situations. Very often, rather than being the one who is right, I found myself as the one to be blamed by everyone. I lost opportunities, I lost people who are dear to my heart, because of my inability to control my anger.

If you are in such a situation, I invite you to join PEACE REVOLUTION, because it is on this platform that I had the chance to begin my practice of meditation. I am today far from the best version of myself, but I can reassure you that many things have changed in my life both personally and professionally since I began to meditate.

Beyond our limits

In 2015, I only had the intellectual capacity to teach and animate radio programs. So, I was a teacher and a journalist. One might wonder about the relationship between skills and meditation. Yet, one of the things that meditation helps us develop is self-confidence. With such a weapon, we are able to make the impossible possible. Self-confidence pushes us beyond conventions to help us discover our innate talents. It is because our mind is not peaceful and quiet that we cannot see beyond our limits. Indeed, all the answers to the different questions that we ask are already within us, and it is in this that meditation helps us develop new habits, formerly beyond our reach.

From TV host to Digital Strategist

I would like to start from the premise that I was a teacher and a journalist in 2015, without any other classical training and without any other aptitude. After only 2 years of meditation practice, I found myself in a professional world completely different from what I have always been. First of all, I found myself as a TV host, then I had the ability to manage community projects and recently I have become a digital strategist. I have also quickly and easily learned to develop new skills such as Web Marketing and Personal Branding. I excel in graphic and video editing, as well as in the creation of websites. Things formerly beyond my reach have become possible today. But how?

Becoming a Master of My Life

Mediation is a mental exercise that helps us find the calm of our mind in order to seize all its resources. Human beings cannot succeed or prosper because many things prevent them. We run after things of this world forgetting to take care of our spirit. The mind is the engine that makes everything start in our life and its potential is infinite. When we have the chance to access this potential, everything becomes possible and nothing is impossible. Meditation is therefore the tool that allows us to take control of our mind and become a master of our life. If you want to learn to meditate, you can start your own experience by registering for free with the Self-Development Program (SDP) available online on the PEACE REVOLUTION website.

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Do you believe in unconditional love?

Unconditional love is the kind of love we can give unlimitedly without conditions; it is the presence of loving kindness in life for life.

In the first years of life, we learn that love is conditioned; used as a reward for good behaviour. Over time, we face relationships in which we doubt whether we are truly worthy of love and being loved. Every human being from birth must receive care, affection, kindness, respect, acceptance, and recognition. As soon as someone is deprived of these basic needs of learning and survival, he or she begins to form gaps and misconceptions of life, in some cases, they are irreparable.

We often demand a lot, we look for permanence and security in relationships, we pretend that others complete us and fill our needs and when we do not obtain it, they result in another failure. But the truth is that only unconditional love is permanent and free of ties. As the definition says, this type of love is not conditioned to something or someone. It simply is.

Some of the practices we can do to cultivate unconditional love for ourselves and others:

Self-love

It is the ability to love ourselves enough, to recognize ourselves as valuable, that we have things to give, and the pride of being who we are. It also includes self-esteem and the ability to be self-reliant. It is the freedom to develop individuality until we become people capable of creating and nurturing healthy and lasting relationships, starting with the relationship with ourselves.

We must understand that there is no limitation in the capacity to love, there are no limits to love, and therefore, we have the capacity to love ourselves and others. It is impossible to love someone if we don’t love ourselves.

Mistakenly, we tend to seek love and approval outside, rarely realizing that this feeling is born from within, in our heart. We must learn to cultivate self-love and prepare ourselves to expand unconditional love and kindness to others.

Self-compassion

People who are compassionate with themselves recognize that failures are experiences, so they take a balanced approach to negative emotions when they fail. Contrary to what we may think, when we treat ourselves with compassion, we encourage personal and professional growth.

By becoming aware that we are struggling with negative feelings, we allow ourselves to respond with kindness and understanding instead of judging and criticizing what is wrong with us. That self-compassionate attitude is a practice of goodwill towards ourselves.

Self-knowledge

At an early age, we discover ourselves as individual beings, that although we depend on each other, we have our own identity. Self-knowledge allows us to discover who we are, and how to differentiate ourselves from others. It is a personal work to discover what my strengths and weaknesses are; what I like and what I do not; what I want and what I do not want.

Taking the look inward can be difficult at times due to the traumas that we have faced. That is why it is important to develop methods and techniques that help us know who we really are and what we have to share. Once we understand and discover ourselves, we are able to understand and discover others, accepting the reality of life and the individuality of each one.

Metta

The word Pali Metta is a term with multiple meanings such as benevolent love, goodwill, and non-violence. Metta is also defined as a strong desire for the welfare and happiness of others. It is an altruistic attitude of love and friendliness as opposed to mere kindness based on self-interest, that is, it lacks personal interest.

Metta is, in effect, “the universal love that leads to the liberation of the mind”. (Philosophy and practice of universal love by Acharya Buddharakkhita)

By human nature, we are interested in the personal search for improvement, but what would happen if we learn to think about universal welfare and growth?

In a world threatened by so much destruction, greed, hatred, lust, and envy, Metta can be practised as a method of healing and liberation of the mind. So, it becomes a necessity for all activities to be designed in a way that promotes the welfare of all beings.

How to practice Metta?

(Philosophy and practice of universal love by Acharya Buddharakkhita)

Sit in a comfortable position in a quiet place. Keep your eyes closed, repeat the word Metta for some time and mentally evoke its meaning – love as opposed to hatred, resentment, arrogance, impatience, pride and as a deep feeling of goodwill, sympathy, and kindness that promotes happiness and well-being of others.

Now visualize your own face with a happy and radiant mood. All the time observe your face like a mirror, contemplate yourself in a cheerful mood and put yourself in that same state during meditation. A cheerful person cannot get angry or harbour negative thoughts and feelings.

Having visualised yourself in a state of happiness, repeat the thought:

“May I be free from hostility,

free from affliction,

free from anguish;

May I live happily and at peace”

As you float with this thought, you become like a full container, whose contents are ready to overflow in all directions.

Then visualize your meditation teacher or spiritual guide, contemplate him or her in a happy mood and project the thought:

“That my teacher be free from hostility,

free from affliction,

free from anguish;

May he live happily”

And think of other people who are venerable and who are alive – monks, teachers, parents, elders – and with intensity, extend to each of them the Metta‘s thought in the same way.

The visualisation must be clear and the thought must be well “desired”. If the visualisation is done in haste or the desire is superficial or mechanical, the practice will be of little benefit.

Now take the time to visualise one by one of your loved ones, starting with the members of your own family, flooding each one with abundant rays of benevolent love. Spiritual love should be the same to everyone, even to your wife or husband, without involving the element of worldly love.

Then you should visualize neutral people, people who do not like or dislike you, as neighbours, colleagues at work, acquaintances. It radiates the same thought:

“That this person be free from hostility,

free from affliction,

free from anguish;

that he/she lives happily”

Having radiated thoughts of love to each one of this circle, you must now visualise people whom you may have misunderstood or whom you disliked. For each one, repeat mentally:

“I do not have hostility towards him/her,

that he/she does not have any hostility towards me.

That he/she is happy “

In this way, while visualizing all these people, the barrier is broken caused by likes and dislikes, attachment and hatred. When one is able to consider an enemy without malevolence and with the same will that he has for a dear friend, Metta, he acquires supreme impartiality, elevating the mind until it becomes unlimited.

* Visualisation means “calling the mind” or making certain objects visible in the mind, such as a person, an address, a category of beings. Imagine the people towards whom the thoughts of love have to be projected or extended. By irradiation is meant the projection of certain thoughts that promote the well-being of those people towards whom we direct the mind.

You can expand Metta in all directions and to all living beings, as much as you wish, covering everything with abundant thoughts of universal love.

What is unconditional love?

Unconditional love is the love that is born from the heart, the one that motivates us to give in an infinite way and that begins with our own love. The ability to value ourselves, compassionately accepting ourselves as we are. From the personal work of knowing ourselves, we managed to experience the satisfaction of focusing not only on the individual but also on the collective.

For this, 42 days Self Development Program can be very helpful.

“May all beings be happy, may all beings be at peace.”

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Experiencing Positive Through the Negative

Like peanut butter and dark chocolate, Jersey and traffic are as common a pairing. Hardly as delicious as the former, the latter sometimes lends itself to getting one’s creative gears going. With the right song and head-space, you can easily find yourself at your destination before you know it!

One song that was recently on the radio was “Every Storm” by Gary Allan. I hadn’t heard it in a while, but had liked it enough before to have downloaded the single years ago. As I listened to it after a while, it got me thinking about the negatives we all sustain in our lives, and how we get through them.

From there, I began to think about negatives from the past, in the present, and those that may occur in the future. However, it wasn’t so much with a depressed viewing, contrary as that sounds; but with an understanding of the positives that can come from each time frame.

Negatives From the Past

As you get old enough, it becomes easier to pinpoint some negative examples from your life as you gain experience. Losing a relative is a common one, and if it’s someone you’re especially close with, a jarring one for sure. You were probably experiencing a lot of bad emotions and devastation during that time, and found it hard to concentrate on much else.

“Every storm runs, runs out of rain” is the beginning of the chorus in the song. Now as hard as the above example was, there does seem to be some truth to that? This, of course, depends on the person and situation, but looking back on those past examples, how do you feel now? Sure, sad, depressed and/or longing could easily describe those emotions; but you’re here, now, after sustaining those negatives. The pain isn’t as raw if you’re far enough removed, and you’re literally experiencing the clear skies from that dark time.

Negatives From the Present

Most people can at least name one, if not multiple, and the hope is –  it’s not that serious and/or common. But as you’re wading through the muck of those examples, is there someone at your side helping you through it? If not, are you finding that you’re able to fight through it on your own? Is it moving you to make better decisions, and/or course correct where need be? If you answer “no” to any of that, consider what the positives behind changing your thinking could do for your present state.

However, if you answer “yes” to any of those questions, then you should hopefully find some positivity through that as well. For example, if you can’t get traction with an artistic endeavour, the hope is you still have people around you to encourage you to keep going. If they’re few and far between, then let the light of your creativity keep burning, if for no other reason than the love of your art. The point is to appreciate the positives behind those at your side that keep you motivated, and or your personal determination to see your project through.

Negatives From the Future

Well, no one wants to think about this but let’s be honest, we all do. Again the variety of ways negatives could manifest in your future are many. I won’t even use one as an example because especially as a positive thinker, I’d be going against the type to really delve into that head-space.

But, don’t mistake positive for naïve, as, trust me, quite a few do! None of us are going to get to the finish line without sweating, an untied shoelace, and/or a shin splint or two. And if that sounds negative that’s because it is; but it also allows you to appreciate the abundance in your life now. If that’s lacking, then changing your outlook and energy could not only benefit you today, but every tomorrow that you’ll have for the rest of your life.

In The End

If nothing else, this should focus your determination to never let the negative win out. You survived your past examples, scarred but still standing. Your present negative status may be bogging you down, but you can and will get through it if you focus enough on the positive energy within you. And the future may yet be explored, but you can prepare for any eventuality as best you can by knowing that the negative will never be permanent… Because it doesn’t have to be.

“So hold your head up and tell yourself that there’s something more, and walk out that door.” That’s another line from the song, and very much represents the theme of this entire article. Have you been able to take the positive from the negative at any time in your life? As wide ranging as they can be and/or potentially devastating, focusing on the best will help you get through the worst.

And whether that door from the song is physical or not, use the negative to learn from, and to leave past and excel. Because the past is gone, present is all around us, and future is yet to be.

Photo Credits

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5 tips for a happy life

Do you ever feel completely helpless and lousy? I have good news – this happens to everyone, and this is why you can choose either to dive into this feeling or remind yourself that all feelings are ok. In this article, I will talk about happy habits. I will show you how to remind yourself: things will be fine, even in those moments when everything seems hopeless.

1. Exercise every day 

Your body and mind are interconnected, at this point of your being alive they cannot be separated. Everything you do to your body will affect your mind. Do something good for your body: 1) exercise, it will change chemical balance and make you happier; 2) get a massage and give yourself enough relaxation; 3) always sleep enough. People who don’t sleep end up being useless walking around like zombies.

2. Make it a rule of thumb to smile at strangers

When you learn to be nice to those people you don’t know, you will also be nicer to yourself. Go in front of the mirror and frown – how does it feel? Now smile – how does it feel? No comment. Smile as much as you can!

3. Happy surprises for your loved ones with attention and gifts

Humans are empathetic beings. Our mirroring neurons can literally make us feel what another person is feeling at the moment. When people around you are happy, satisfied, grateful, so will be you. Become the creator of good human environment for yourself – surprise your loved one with a cup of tea, a pleasant gift, a massage, or a chore that you do for them.

4. Take yourself on a date

When you go on a date alone, you can do exactly what you want, no need to compromise anything. This practice is important for two reasons: 1) you allow yourself to want something; 2) you practice asking yourself what you want and giving it to yourself. Once you do it, you become happier, and people around you react to your happiness, mirroring you. Learn more about artist dates and creativity recovering in Julia Cameron’s book the Artist Way.

5. Humans have feelings. It is ok to feel what you feel.

– I want to feel everything this life brings me, – my friend said.

– I want to only feel happy all the time,  I don’t care about anything else, – I responded.

Looking back to this conversation which happened 3 years ago, I realize how blind it was of me to expect myself always to be happy. It is like having sunny days without nighttime or rain, like summers without winters. It is ok, but a bit flavourless. Whenever you encounter a state you aren’t enjoying, or feeling something weird and uncomfortable, I congratulate you – you are out of your comfort zone, and you are growing! It is one of the most amazing and rewarding experiences in life to grow! Go for it and be brave! Growth will reward you with happiness, and once you drop your expectations of always being happy, you will see how you let go a lot of tension too.

Which one of these tips will you practice today? Let me know in comments!

When you need to relax and reset yourself from this busy world, do a ten minute guided meditation. If you enjoy it, consider joining our free 42 days online self-development program.

Remember – only you decide how bright you shine.

Love is real, good things happen and we will be ok.

If you enjoyed this article, read more of me in Morning rituals to start your day,  How to sit during meditation and  4 ways traveling makes you grow.

 

 

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How Does Priority Setting Help The Mind?

Success is something we all are moving to. We all want to get to our project destination; a successful end of what we do. Regardless the size of what we manage, our daily happenings and responsibilities, we set goals to attain a successful completion of our project. In this process, priority setting cuts across all domains of life and once practised, it increases concentration and focus, the mind gets less stressed as we know what we are up to and what we expect to reach.

Many of us have more than one activity to carry out each day, some may have different deadlines to meet on daily basis. Multitasking which in most cases comes with some sort of stress can still be managed, and we can still find balance if we learn to set priorities in what we do. In these few lines, we explore how priority setting in our tasks aids our mind to feel relaxed and still while dealing with many issues at the same time.

Urgent vs important

Before we start the journey, we must know where the road leads to. We need to have our destination in mind. Next, we need to know what means we can use to get there faster and easier. Some of our tasks are urgent, some are important. The dilemma comes when balancing the value, trying to know which one will have more value if done first. Among the two equally important ones, getting to know which is complex and engaging matters. Hence, establishing a roadmap or drafting a framework of schedules are the first steps towards setting priorities. Of course, being clear on our goals helps so that we can swallow what we can chew.

Knowing what is urgent and what is important is the starting point. First, we may need to clear the one which is urgent and needs immediate attention as the rest of our activities may depend on whether that is done or not. Knowing the very important, important and non-important tasks enables us to know where to put the line and deal only with important ones. The non-important  tasks can easily be postponed and rescheduled to later times as their non-completion may not affect our project much.

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Priority among other priorities

I recently got to know that self-discipline plays a role here. When we are that person who set the goals, classify our priorities, set all kinds of execution plans, and we are that person who can’t say NO to him or herself, our set priorities may change because we need to be strict on ourselves and deny to ourselves anything that can alter our plans. However, flexibility may help only when it comes to setting priority among other priorities. In that case, one can be adaptable and flexible to choose either of them, provided they all will be done. This reduces stress because we get to know what we are doing, we become aware of the resources on our disposal to accomplish it and we are sure it will be done. No panic, no sweating under high performing air-condition, we gain control over our tasks. Our mind becomes calm, hence we can concentrate and focus much better.

Start when you go to bed

We may not need to be managers of big offices, firms, enterprises, organizations to exercise setting priorities in our life. All starts in that very moment when we go to bed. As many people say, it is the starting time of a new day. Taking your pencil and jotting down few lines of planned activities of the next day in the order we want to accomplish them often prepares us to become managers of our own life. We get to know what does not need to come on the list and what must be done by all means. Then, during the day, thriving to do what we have planned will make our mind in control, and gradually as we keep doing that, it becomes a part of us. Once we are self-made managing directors, we can see how beneficial this can be to us and those around us.

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