The Top 5 Regrets To Avoid for a Happier Life

Have you ever wondered if there is something you could learn in this moment of your life; if there is a source of wisdom you could access by connecting with those who are your seniors that could give you some advice on how to save your time, energy and prevent you from repeating the same mistakes?

One way to do it is to go through the top 5 regrets that people express as they reach the end of their lives:

1. I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself

It is important that on everyday life you accept yourself as you are in the present moment, get in touch with your feelings as often as needed, listen to your inner talk, be honest, forgive yourself, and feed your curiosity.

Then, dream big and know your heart’s true desire, – and the path will reveal.

2. I wish I hadn’t worked so hard

Stress, burn out, feeling overworked and underpaid from taking on too many responsibilities is the cause of many stress-related illnesses. In order to maintain work-life balance, set appropriate boundaries and intentionally look for a career and a position that will allow you to make a good living and enjoy your life.

Health brings freedom and a multitude of possibilities, so use it right. Money is not the goal, but the means to fulfil your desires.

3. I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings

What we feel but don’t manifest is often not fulfilled. Bitterness and resentment affect both the mind and the body. Here are some steps to get the courage to express your feelings: clarify your intentions, consider the risks and benefits involved, take accountability for your own emotions, start small and practice regularly, respect others and keep a positive attitude.

4I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends

It has been proven that the quality of our relationships with others will dictate our level of happiness. Wondering what you need to do to stay in touch with friends often? Call them, set weekly reminders, meet regularly, contact close friends in times of “crisis”, be present on important occasions, find ways to show appreciation and know when to say “sorry”.

5I wish I allowed myself to be happier

Here’s what you can do to be happy every day: wake up early and plan your day, prioritise your health, make time for regular meals and being outdoors, learn something new, declutter – social media included, spend time with your loved ones and do something nice for yourself every day.

Happiness is a choice. Feeling comfortable in patterns that keep you miserable shuts the door to happiness.

Be bold and set compelling goals that are motivating. Take time to get a clear vision of what it is you would like to achieve and try to see yourself in 5 years, having achieved all these goals. Imagine yourself having accomplished your goals in bright colours and fine details, turn up the volume and hear the excitement in other people’s voices. Keeping yourself busy, motivated, surrounded by the right people leaves no space for regret.

Photo credits: Leon Liu@unsplash.com

Bring The Real Love In, Baby!

Universe Woman

On desiring infinity while experiencing finitude. Thoughts on love. Part II.

Talking and writing about unconditional love is not difficult. What is tricky is to bring that magnificent, metaphysical love into our daily lives, into our relationships. That´s another thing. In moments of crisis, we get into this place where love is not pleasant and joyful, but challenging and uncertain. We [may] love unconditionally but our personalities clash from time to time. Our insecurities arise, we don´t know where we are going, we get all sort of disappointments, satisfactions, doubts, certainties, frustrations, happiness and, yes, sorrows too. There is a bit of everything in there.

In this eagerness to fill my emptiness. / In this eagerness to look and to see what wishfully I am missing. / In this eagerness of my mind to experience you in such a way that I can find myself. / In this eagerness, I forgot and I found in the silence the disintegration of every form: my own reflection.” Yasmín Navarrete [book “Por Descartes”]

When we practice loving-kindness meditation (also known as Metta), we expand our minds and stop thinking only for our benefit, on satisfying only our desires, and we replace, at least for few moments, our thoughts of “I want” and “give me” for “may all living beings experience happiness”, “I wish good to all”. If we really dare to look inside of us and recognize our own demons, we agree that these moments of cessation of selfishness are priceless.

It has been taught by wise people (I learned this from Catholic priests and Buddhist monks) that giving is what makes our relationship grow and prosper, healthy and satisfactory. It is not surprising then that giving is a form of loving-kindness and a way to go beyond the limits of our reactive nature or ego. The way to bring in the loving-kindness that we practice in meditation into our lives is by giving. We expand ourselves and step out of our egotistic nature when giving, even in restricted or stressful circumstances.

But let´s be careful on this: not because giving is the way of development and growth we are gonna tolerate abusive relationships or situations and continue giving at expenses of ourselves. What we can practice is to give, and find creative ways to give every time, not only when we feel good and feelings are reciprocated, but especially when we are under the influence of our own ego, when we want to react, when we want to yell at our partner or friend, when we feel victims of the situation, insecure about the relationship, when we complain, when we judge, when we blame, when we take our relationship for granted. That´s the job that love, real love, guide us to do. It will never lead us to self-destruction, but to a more and more delightful and complete existence.

Ego has no memory of love experience. If you are really in love, for that single moment an ecstasy happens; the ego is not there. Boundaries merge, mingle, meet, disappear into each other.” Osho

The nature of love is unconditional, infinite, but we live in a conditioned reality (we experience material limits, limits of time and space, we have social/cultural conditioning, personal beliefs about how things “should be”, individual needs, our personality etc.). Considering this, writing about unconditional love seems naive, delusional or idealistic, so… what do we do? In the meantime, nothing. Our unique responsibility is to keep our ego at bay, to transform that energy, when it emerges, into something to give, and to become a bit less selfish in the process… after all not only our close relationships benefit from this, but also our occupation: what is better than a business which seeks contributing to society in a good way? Is there anything better than someone who works for the benefit of others and not only for him/herself? We just allow love to flow, to continue its journey and to stretch and restrict us so we can finally start to be open to the possibility that love is not about us or for us, but through us.

You can check the first part of this article here

Credits for the image @spikaartist

“Out of this world” into my life.

In the early 90’s, when I was a kid, there was a TV show called “Out of this world”. It was a young teenager named Evie who finds out that her father is from a different planet and because of that she has superpowers. Well, actually, just one. An amazing one! Evie is able to stop time. She touches the tips of her index fingers and everything around her freezes. She could then ignore her mom’s scolding, get some extra time to check her history book before answering her teacher or even give herself an extra minute gazing at her crush passing by in the hall. Continue reading ““Out of this world” into my life.”