Life often happens the other way round — such a thing. People make plans, arrange activities, work projects, life decisions, and so on. But, nevertheless, the truth is that many of those initiatives and dispositions have a different result from what was expected. Did it happen to you too? And then, what to do? How to feel?
Some people may go for resilience. What is resilience anyway? The Cambridge dictionary describes it as: the quality of being able to return quickly to a previous good condition after problems.
But when thinking about it, is this always possible? Wouldn’t it be better to focus on our target when using resilience rather than merely going back to a previous state? Anyway, no one can warranty us that by being resilient, we will feel better. We could even be clinging onto a kind of feeling, emotion, or thought, which will keep us away from discoveries, emotional and spiritual growth, or even new life paths.
Stubborn, or flexible
For some, resilience can be understood as something close to stubbornness. As if you were meant to hold in there no matter what, “surrounding is not an option”. This approach is everything but wise. By pushing and forcing things, we may face significant amounts of pain with even worse consequences, not only for us but also for those around us. An intelligent person would know his priorities, when to go on, and when to stop. As simple as that, there is nothing wrong with a standstill. In fact, if we – people – went more for a standstill approach, life would be easier and more peaceful.
On the contrary, in order to acquire the full potential of adapting to difficult situations we may face, the idea of flexibility might be more adaptive and valuable. Resilient, yes; stubborn, not that useful.
Stubbornness wrongly focused leads to anger, which eventually will end up in a conflict, rage, greediness, and so on — delegating the real vital matters of the heart, the mind and the soul to at least the second position, will most likely bring negative consequences (soon or after). This is when the problems become bigger related to the things happening the way you do not want, leading to unnecessary burdens and troubles.
Life is malleable
Sometimes conflict is good, as stress is too. They help us solve problems, realise facts, and learn. However, ill-feeling and rage may not be that helpful — actually, the opposite.
When living, we will always find situations and events against our will, desires, and plans. That is how being alive in this unpredictable and continuously changing world happens to be. Learning how to be resilient, when to stop, when to be at a standstill, or even to feel stress is the first step to solve and accept any situation you may face in life. All starts within you. The self domain is to win out.
If you want to learn more about self-domain, resilience, and flexibility, you need to listen to your inside, and meditation is a great tool to be in peace within yourself; you can check our online self-development program, and download our Mind stories app.