Why communication is the essence in relationships

Words carry significant energy. If powerful, each message can convey a wide range of emotions. Therefore, it’s worth putting the effort on how to use them in the right direction and for the right purpose towards effective communication for better relationships.

A message can be broken down into 4 levels, as follows:

1. What I mean

2. What I say

3. What you hear

4. What you assume

Communication creates, builds and breaks relationships

People react, and as a consequence live their lives more in accordance with their perception of reality than the reality itself. For example, romantic relationships are influenced by different love languages, and connection tends to fail when the partner is unable to speak the same language of love as the other person involved. According to Gary Chapman, the 5 primary love languages can be identified as: words of affirmation, physical touch, receiving gifts, quality time, acts of service.

Communication is and remains the very essence of our relationships. How well we communicate will determine the quality of relationships and give value to our intentions. Thus, communication creates, builds and breaks relationships.

It’s wise to start from the assumption that all of us are imperfect communicators. The role of experience, the perception of body language, the cognitive bias, interpretations in delivering the message are changing some of the meaning.

Become a seeker and a searcher of meaning 

The manner of interpreting what a message triggers inside ourselves is powerful. Better understanding often lies with simple actions. Asking the person what they said, what they meant by the message rather than judging and putting people off can be learned and practised.

Being committed to this, no matter our role, can make a huge difference in our interactions. We can move from the position of misjudging and rejecting to deeper understanding. This way, one can escape the trap of arriving at the wrong assumption and enjoy lasting relationships.

Become a seeker and a searcher of meaning by prioritising what the person intended to say. The reason we wish to do this for is more happiness, peace of mind, and less rejection.

Practical steps to be more mindful and listen with intention

Effective communication has more than beneficial effect and an important role in different types of relationships. Communication is a thinking process during which a person inevitably moves from facts to a decision or an action. Asking the right questions will help understand and decode what is really happening. So, before replying or judging a situation ask yourself:

1. How sensitive are you to what others are saying?

2. Are you aware of what others imply but do not say?

3. Do you understand how others feel?

4. Do you listen beyond the spoken words?

Using this communication model can help people come to better conclusions and listen with the intention of understanding.  It’s a reasoning process that allows us remain objective when communicating with other people. This type of increase in understanding and communication abilities makes it possible to reach a shared conclusion without any conflict.

You can raise your levels of awareness and improve your communication abilities with our 42 days program.

Photo by SHTTEFAN @ Unsplash

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